Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Just shy of sIx mONTHs!

I truly enjoy looking back at life. I remember times when I seriously considered being an architect, a fighter pilot, a marine, a Navy Seal, a race car driver, a model, a teacher, a mechanic, and so many more. You see I grew up in America. You may wonder why I would point that out. If I still lived in America I would think the same, but I don't. I am current living the life as a High school teacher in South Korea. The culture around me presses their students just short of death compared to the States. The overwhelming norm in South Korea is the students having the responsibility of providing for and housing their parents later in life. I know that is also practiced in America, but less common these days. Also in this culture that pressure is reflected in the incredible pressure of going to school until 9:00p.m. or later. In a country smaller than, or about the size of Kentucky, there are over 21 million people. Competition for any and every job here is steep. If you don't get a job as a doctor, lawyer, CEO, or something else high, your whole family works themselve to the bone to make the living that I would expect to be able to make alone back in the states. It is now summer and instead of my students going home at 9p.m, they go home at either 3:30 or 6p.m. Well, that's what I thought, then I found out some of them still go to hawgwans (private academies specializing in certain studies). My high school students will get one week of break before the next semester begins. After talking with a teacher yesterday I was happy to discover the great fluctuation in class attendence is due to some students simply staying home. The school holds three weeks of summer school for all students to attend, but they are not really held accountable for it, and yet I still have entire classes of near 40 students show up.
The culture is so incredibly different here. Parts of the culture seem advanced, and other ways are soooo.... different, almost upside down and backwards from the states. I personally don't think it is right to work students 70+ hours a week in school. The obvious lack of social skill development in the students' lives along with a grave unhappiness is obvious.
So why are you staying Kris?
I'm staying because I get to be a source of encouragement, inspiration, care, kindness, listening, and a smile for each and every student I teach. I strive to pour myself into their lives and education with the best of me. This is an exhausting, and wonderfully educational experience. This opportunity is making me a stronger Christian, friend, brother, Son, Cousine, future husband, and overall person. Thanks be to God. Even though the opportunity is great, I do need a rest. I officially get 4 full weeks of vacation a year. I decided to split mine up with one in the summer, and three in the winter. So from the looks of it, I will be heading back to visit my friends and family around next February of 2012.

Thankful

I'm simply complex. I'm complexily simple.
All statements stated here make perfect sense. Guaranteed. If you don't understand, simply ask. I practice explaining things to hundreds of people every week.

I am thankful for:
Life
Death
Beauty
Miracles
Awareness of Pain
Awareness of starvation
Awareness of troubles I have
Confusion I have
Frustrations I have
Conviction
stress
food
education
opportunities to serve others
opportunities to learn of my weakness as a human
opportunities to observe God's creations.

There is nothing in life or death that God cannot use for good. Yes, NOTHING. :) Blessings upon you, for you too are a creation of God. Don't believ in Him, that's okay, He still believes in you and loves you. :)

Sunday, July 17, 2011

CRAZY LOVE by: Francis Chan ( Pg.42-44)

YOUR JOB IS TO BRING HIM GLORY! :)

I used to believe that in this world there are two kinds of people: natural worriers and naturally joyful people. I couldn't really help it that I was the worrying kind. I'm a problem solver, so I have to focus on things that need fixing. God can see that my intensity and anxiety are ministry related. I worry because I take His work seriously.
Right? But then there's that perplexing command: "rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice!" (Phil. 4:5). You'll notice that it doesn't end with "... unless you're doing something extremely important." No, it's a command for all of us, and it follows with the charge, "Do not be anxious about anything" ( v.6). That came as a pretty staggering realization. But what I realized next was even more staggering.
When I am consumed by my problems - stressed out about my life, my family, and my job - I actually convey the belief that I think the circumstances are more important than God's command to always rejoice. In other words, that I have a "right" to disobey God because of the magnitude of my responsibilities.
Worry implies that we don't quite trust that God is big enough, powerful enough, or loving enough to take care of what's happening in our lives.
Stress says that the things we are involved in are important enough to merit our impatience, our lack of grace toward others, or our tight grip of control.
Basically, these two behaviors communicate that it's okay to sin and not trust God because the stuff in my life is somehow exceptional. Both worry and stress reek of arrogance. They declare our tendency to forget that we've been forgiven, that our lives here are brief, that we are headed to a place where we won't be lonely afraid, or hurt ever again, and that in the context of God's strength, our problems are small, indeed.
Why are we so quick to forget God? Who do we think we are?
I find myself relearning this lesson often. Even though I glimpse God's holiness, I am still dumb enough to forget that life is all about God and not about me at all. It goes sort of like this...
Suppose you are an extra in an upcoming movei. you will probably scrutinize that one scene where hundreds of people are milling around, just waiting for that two-fifths of a second when you can see the back of your head. Maybe your mom and your closest friend get excited about that two-fifths of a second with you...maybe. But no one else will realize it is you. Even if you tell them, they won't care. Let's take it a step further. What if you rent out the theater on opening night and invite all your friends and family to come see the new movie about you? People will say, "You're an idiot! How could you think this movie is about you?"
Many Christians are even more delusional than the person I've been describing. So many of us think and live lie the movie of life is all about us.
Now consider the movie of life...
God creates the world. (Were you alive then? Was God talking to you when He proclaimed "It is good" about all He had just made?)
Then people rebel against God (who, if you haven't realized it yet, is the main character in this movie), and God floods the earth to rid it of the mess people made of it.
Several generations later, God singles out a ninety-nine-year-old man called Abram and makes him the father of a nation (did you have anything to do with this?)
Later, along come Joseph and Moses and many other ordinary and inadequate people that the movie is also not about. God is the one who picks them and directs them and works miracles through them.
In the next scene, God sends judges and prophets to His nation because the people can't seem to give Him the one thing He asks of them (obedience).
And then, the climax: The Son of God is born among the people whom God still somehow loves. While in this world, the Son teaches His followers what true love looks like. Then the Son of God dies and is resurrected and goes back up to be with God.
And even though the movie isn't quite finished yet, we know what the last scene holds. It's the scene I already described in chapter 1: the throne room of God. Here every being worships God who sits on the throne, for He alone is worthy to be praised.
From start to finish, this movie is obviously about God. He is the main character. How is it possible that we live as though it is about us?
Our scenes in the movie, our brief lives, fall somewhere between the time Jesus ascends into heaven (Acts) and when we will all worship Go on His throne in heaven (Revelation).l...............

So what does that mean for you? 
Frankly, you need to get over yourself. It might sound harsh, but that's seriously what it means.
Maybe life's pretty good for you right now. God has give you this good stuff so that you can show the world a person who enjoys blessings, but who is still totally obsessed with God.
Or maybe life is tough right now, and everything feels lie as struggle. God has allowed hard things in your life so you can show the world that your God is great and that knowing Him brings peace and joy, even when life is hard. Like the psalmist who wrote, "I saw the prosperity of the wicked... Surely in vain have I kept my heart pure... When I tried to understand all this, it was oppressive to me till I entered the sanctuary of God" (Ps. 73:3, 13, 16-17). It is easy to become disillusioned with the circumstances of our lives compared to others. But in the presence of God, He gives us a deeper peace and joy that transcends it all...Your job is to bring Him glory.

Thursday, July 14, 2011

WOW!!! Who is she?

Adam walks in from the garden of Eden and pops down a seat on God's heavenly coffee bar. This is in an alternate Universe created by God where woman and man were created at the same time and Adam has not ventured to seek any one in particular out yet as a mate.

A: sigh......
G: That was a mighty big sigh for such a small creation. What's on your mind?
A: I just don't get it.
G: What?
A: Woman?
G: What do you mean? (God is playing dumb to help Adam learn how to think)
A: One minute I'm swinging from the trees with my bro John and having a grand time.The next minute I'm snorkling around the tree of life out off the West coast of Jordan and soaking up the sunshine. But whenever I have a moment that John or Jim or susan or lacey and I aren't hanging out, or I'm not spending enough time with you......
G: (smirk)
A: What was that for? What was that smirk for?
G: Something is missing huh?
A: I don't know, its just like, there is this girl out there, and I haven't met her yet, but its like she is watching me and I can never catch her in the act. It's like our souls were meant to be sharing everything and enjoying life together, but we can just never get close enough to actually meet.
G: There isn't.
A: Huh?
G: Well, there is a woman, and she is out there, but she isn't stocking you or anything. What you are feeling is normal.
A: normal?
G: Yeah, I created you in particular to have that yearning in your heart for a woman. You see others romping around the earth with their lovers and you want to share the same joy they have. I created you as an adventurous man, filled with strength, courage, perseverance, and more. But there is one part of you that in order to make fulfill special purposes in your life, I had to make it extra strong, and that is the passion for caring for others deeply.
A: What do you mean, I love my friends, but I'm not obsessed with always having to be there for them.
G: There are more ways of  caring for others than actually being around them, you'll understand as you live longer. In the meantime listen to me. It is okay to feel like there is a missing place in your heart that someone should fill. Don't believe the lies others tell you about you needing to be married before a certain age, or before you build your own tree house or raft for the Amazon river, just trust my timing. Have I lead you wrong yet?
A: no. I don't know why I doubt you so much, you have never let me down.
G: I know why you doubt me.
A: You do?
G: Because you are human. I love our relationship and cherish it daily.
A: Me too!
G: But to keep it how it is, you had to be what you are, human. The downside to being human is you can't fully comprehend my plans, love, or frankly, me.
So, you must trust me. When you desire to meet her, just think about the stars, planets, fish, animals, and how beautifully and masterfully they flow with each other. Each event in their lives have been perfectly timed according to my plans.
A: sigh
G: I know its hard, but know this, that feeling you keep wanting to be fulfilled.... It will be, and it will be more than you could have ever desired for it to be, on one condition.... you trust and follow me.
A: (Adam smiles...... slides off the coffee bar-stool, and strolls back into the garden.

Thursday, July 7, 2011

To: The one who won’t embrace love.

Response in letting love in: (Responsive thoughts evoked by your post from a friend, a brother, and one who shares in some of your frustrations, wonderings, and emotions.)
To: The one who won’t embrace love.
From: The one who (chooses not to) embrace(s) love
God did such an incredible job creating people. He created each one so uniquely that they could spend their whole life trying to understand the others and never succeed and yet so similar that they could understand enough to live peaceably with one another. I lay my uniqueness and commonalities at His feet in praise now. Praise be to the Lord God almighty for creating us to have a chance, and another, and another to serve him through His grace, for I am flawed, learning, and growing. In my opinion God doesn’t simply make works of art, He makes masterpieces. Try imagining Heaven like the most extravagant art gallery. In His gallery he has living masterpieces. Each masterpiece has its own special room. The line to get into the gallery goes out the majestic front doors, down the 7 flights of stairs, around the garden and slowly fades into the distance. Since He is omnipresent, God never leaves the gallery. Why in heaven would so many people stand in a line like that to see some work of art, or even a masterpiece when they could be riding cloud motorcycles, swimming in the pool, or even talking with God personally somewhere else in the kingdom? I’ll tell you why. This gallery is the only gallery where the same masterpiece is never the same as the day before. Not only that, but God is continuously working on each masterpiece simultaneously, twenty-four clouds a day, seven horizons a week. Unlike human works of art that can be studied over time and better understood, to truly enjoy His art, they have to be patient, for have the beauty and enjoyment is in the unknown, truly what is yet to come. In front of each masterpiece, and behind God, is a large seating area. Spirits, angels and other heavenly beings silently filter in and out of the rooms filled by the glory of God. For those simply in awe of the masterpieces the rooms are absolutely silent and filled with the awe and glory and light of His radiance. Simultaneously, those desiring to worship God through song/dance/painting are off stage left and right doing so on the easels and open space provided.
In His masterpiece room where you are the product of His creativity, glory, power, mercy and grace there is a plaque near the work.  This is a very special plaque for on it is your name. No not Chelsea, your heavenly name, the one that only you will know once you see the finished product after arriving there. For everyone else there is the name in which you now go by, and it truly is a beautiful name: Chelsea. I don’t have the solutions for those who experience solitude and hate it, or solitude and love it. I don’t have answers for those who can’t love others, those who can’t love themselves, or those who don’t realize yet the reason they can’t love or be loved by others is because they don’t love themselves. I don’t know why you or anyone else is where they are, or why they are there. Like any human I can speculate and waste time, which I do time to time. Instead of allowing such thoughts to consume your mind, I joyfully encourage you with the LOVE of Christ that fills my heart for you. The difference today between me and others who read and cherished or partially understood your post is not that I care more about you. It is not that I love you more. It is not because, because, because, because….. It is because you need to know that you are completely different from everyone else around you. It is because you need to know that you are the same as everyone else around you. You are a different Masterpiece, maybe a sculpture instead of a painting. Perhaps a relief sculpture, or a modern body paint work, I don’t know. At the same time you are the same as everyone else around you in that you are a Masterpiece. Many, if not all, Masterpieces continually wonder if they are the only one of their kind, and that no one sees them. They get misconceptions of the Masterpiece room they are in, and those in it. They get confused because they can’t see past the current walls. And you know what, they don’t know about the line of people waiting to come watch God work on you. I’m not certain my train of thought is easy to follow, but I encourage you to ponder it. I don’t know what it will take for you to love yourself, God’s creation, but I can tell you that you can’t/won’t be able to do it alone; I know I haven’t been able to. You are loved so very much by God almighty, and many of the things you believe about yourself, which are negative and self defeating, are not true, nor are they honoring to God. Take time daily to listen. Let me redefine that. Take time each day to LISTEN to God, to stand in Awe of Him, His creation, His details. I have a long way to go in “understanding how to love myself” as well, and it is HARD. We can’t see past the walls, but He sees and knows all. I find I began to be able to love the parts of God’s hands in my life more and more, the more I focus on, listen to, study, listen to, pray, listen to, stand in awe of, listen to, and praise Him in all He is.
Peace be with you, for you are truly a beautiful Masterpiece of the Highest power of all the universe and galaxies!
Your brother in CHRIST,
Kris Wiens
P.S. Your standards and expectations are not ridiculous, they are truly inspired by God’s word, and therefore, breathtakingly beautiful, truly a breath of fresh air. Peace be with you.